My only Hope

The Secrets of Real Joy Part IX:

CONTENTMENT

All of us desire to be happy. In fact, we have a loving God who wants us to be joyful. Yet, a lot of times we wallow in thoughts that suggest we can only be happy if we had a higher paying job, a more successful business, a bigger house, a better spouse, or for singles, a partner in life. However, real joy that springs from contentment does not depend on external circumstances. Paul says, “Not that I speak from want; for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am.” (Philippians 4:11). Bill Gothard puts it this way, “Contentment is realizing that God has already given me everything I need for my present happiness.” The following questions will help us unlock the secret of joy in contentment.
What is contentment? Contentment is neither a license to be complacent nor an excuse for failure, but rather, it is having a perspective that we can be happy regardless of where we are in our lives. If we are not content with what we have right now, we can be sure that no amount of blessing will make us happy. And even if it does not come to us naturally, contentment is something we can learn. Paul, who has undergone tremendous hardships states, “I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need.” (Philippians 4:12). The biblical definition of contentment is having the attitude of gratefulness and peace born out of trust and surrender to the will of God in every circumstance. Let us learn how to be thankful for what we have rather than focus on what we don’t have. We need to surrender our circumstances  for God has our best interest at heart and if we learn how to put our confidence in Him, we gain the spirit of contentment that transcends our present circumstances.
Why is contentment important? We cannot wait for our wishes to come true in order to become content. Contentment begins today, for it is found in Christ. Hence, contentment must be Christ-centered. It is focused on what God has given us and not on what we don’t have. Our joy is focused on the Lord and not on circumstances. Thus, in any situation, we experience joy and peace in the Lord. (2 Corinthians 11:23-25).
Our problem has always been our sinful nature. It tempts us to look at our fellowmen and compare what they have with what we don’t have. And when we begin to compare, we start demanding what we think we should have and are entitled to. Then, contentment disappears. We need to learn how to count our blessings. Doing so will help us appreciate everything God has given us and prevent us from grumbling. When we are content, we trust the sovereignty of God in all aspects of our lives, believing that there are no accidents in life and that our loving Father has our best interest in mind. (Matthew 20:12-13).
We are also reminded in I Timothy 6:7-8, “For we have brought nothing into the world, so we cannot take anything out of it either. And if we have food and covering, with these we shall be content.” When we become obsessed with wanting to have what other people possess, we lose sight of the reality that we will eventually leave everything behind. Being content will change our whole perspective in life. It will give us eternal perspective and will help us determine what is really important in life. (Luke 12:19-21; 1 Timothy 6:9-10).
Learning how to be content protects us from this pitfall of envy. Although there is nothing wrong with money and prosperity, there is always the danger of loving earthly possessions more than anything else and losing sight of what truly matters: loving Jesus with all our heart.
How do we experience contentment? Contentment begins with Christ. Philippians 4:13 says, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” Clearly, apart from Jesus Christ, we will never experience contentment. When we begin to have an intimate relationship with Christ, our perspective in life and the way we think change. It is only through Him that our eyes can be opened to the reality of eternity. The Lord Himself promised, “I will never desert you, nor will I forsake you.” (Hebrews 13:5). We become truly content as our hearts and minds are transformed by Christ. Epictetus states, “I am always content with what happens, for what God chooses is better than what I choose.” When we believe that God knows what is best for us and that there is more to life than possessions, we are able to keep our eyes on our past, present and future blessings. The secret of experiencing contentment is Jesus Christ.
Therefore, if we want to find true joy and contentment, let us turn to the source: Jesus Christ. Let us count our blessings and rejoice in what God has done, is presently doing and will surely continue to do in our lives. We must have a complete trust in God and have the conviction that He knows what He is doing which is always for the best.

The Secrets of Real Joy Part VIII

ARRESTING THE ROBBERS OF OUR JOY IN THE LORD

People turn to so many things in the hope of finding happiness. But joy is oftentimes elusive because they are seeking in the wrong places. Blaise Pascal said, “In every man’s heart is a God-shaped vacuum that only God can fill.” Joy is found, not in pleasure, money or possessions, position or prestige, power and fame, but in the Lord Jesus Christ alone. Thus Paul said, “Rejoice in the Lord always…!” (Philippians 4:4).

Christians should be the happiest people on earth, yet not all Christians are happy 100% of the time. That’s because we have allowed many things to rob us of our joy in the Lord. Here are a few joy robbers and how to arrest them:

Conflicts in relationships. Since conflicts are inevitable, we need to learn how to neutralize this threat to our relationships. We should arrest them, and the way to do that is to be gentle. To be gentle means to be caring, kind and patient, to choose not to be harsh, angry, grumpy or irritable. Between being gentle and being easily angered, we are more inclined towards the latter. Hence, we need to practice the presence of God to develop gentleness. “Let your forbearing spirit be known to all men. The Lord is near” (Philippians 4:5). There may be provocation, but when we know that the Lord is near, we will learn to behave and henceforth avoid conflict.

Concerns over circumstances. When we focus too much on the problems of life, we become anxious. According to Vance Havner, “Worry, like sitting on a rocking chair, will give you something to do, but won’t get you anywhere.” Ulcer is what we get for making mountains out of mole hills. Of our worries, based on a survey, 40% are about things that will never happen; 30% are about things about the past that can’t be changed; 12% are about other people’s criticisms, mostly untrue; 10% is about health, which gets worse with stress; and only 8% are about real problems that need to be faced.

Paul’s advice to arrest this joy robber is to be prayerful. “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God” (Philippians 4:6). Not only do we need to pray, we need to do so with thanksgiving, trusting God for His solutions. And His promised Word is: “And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, shall guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:7).

Negative thinking. We usually catch ourselves dwelling on negative thoughts when we grumble or complain. Always looking at the bad side distorts everything altogether. If we think negatively about the Philippines and we mostly complain about our government, how can we develop love for our country? The only way to arrest this problem is to be positive. “Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things” (Philippians 4:8). Having a positive mind and attitude can give one tremendous joy.

Disobedience. When we violate God’s holiness through disobedience, a certain restlessness develops within us, for we know there are consequences to sin. Hence, we must be obedient. “The things you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, practice these things; and the God of peace shall be with you” (Philippians 4:9). Jesus Christ modeled for us a life of obedience. He was obedient to His earthly parents (Luke 2:51). He was likewise obedient to His Heavenly Father and fulfilled His mission on earth (John 17:4).

God commanded husbands to love their wives, and wives to submit to their husbands (Ephesians 5:22-25). God knows that man’s greatest need is respect, and the woman’s, love. Disobedience to these commands starts the “crazy cycle” – husband acts without love towards the wife, wife reacts by treating husband without respect, the husband then reacts to the wife’s disrespect by giving her an unloving treatment. And the whole cycle continues. But if the wife feels loved by the husband, she will readily submit to her husband. Hence, obedience is the way to break the pattern.

True happiness can be found in Jesus alone. What we need to ask ourselves is: Are we in the Lord? If we are not sure, we can turn to Jesus, admit that we are sinners, ask for forgiveness, repent, and receive Jesus into our lives as our personal Savior and Lord.

There is joy in salvation and the Holy Spirit helps us bear more of its fruit, however, there are also joy robbers. We have learned previously about a number of them - people, circumstances, worry and fear. Added to this list are conflict and self-centeredness.

Conflict and self-centeredness are inter-related. Self-centeredness triggers conflicts, and the root of it all is PRIDE.  For these thieves of joy to be eliminated, the solution is HUMILITY. It can be said, therefore, that JOY IS A BY-PRODUCT OF HUMILITY.

Philippians 2:1-11 says: “If therefore there is any encouragement in Christ, if there is any consolation of love, if there is any fellowship of the Spirit, if any affection and compassion, make my joy complete by being of the same mind, maintaining the same love, united in spirit, intent on one purpose. Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind let each of you regard one another as more important than himself; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others. Have this attitude in yourselves which was also in Christ Jesus, who, although He existed in the form of God, did not regard equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied Himself, taking the form of a bond-servant, and being made in the likeness of men. And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. Therefore, also God highly exalted Him, and bestowed on Him the name which is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of those who are in heaven, and on earth, and under the earth, and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.” How can this passage be applied in relation to the thieves of joy of conflict and self-centeredness?

CONFLICT. We are imperfect individuals, differing from one another in views, personalities and character. It is therefore but normal to have conflicts in human relationships. Conflict arises even among mature Christians. We may not expect uniformity, but we can preserve unity in the body. Although we may disagree about certain things, we can agree to remain in harmony with one another through the fellowship that binds us together by virtue of our identity in Christ.

The devil is the culprit of divisions and discord. When we have something against someone, what do we tend to do? We talk to other people about it. But issues need to be ironed out between the two conflicting parties. Talking about them with people who are not part of the problem or solution is plain and simple gossip. Satan uses the strategy of malicious gossip to destroy relationships and widen rifts. How many friendships have been destroyed by gossip? If we’re not careful, we may encourage it through passive listening, or we may actively participate by adding fuel to the fire. Without realizing it, we are being accomplices to the devil’s demolition job. When we refuse to join in the gossip fray, and instead urge the person who has issues to talk to the party concerned, it terminates the devil’s work.

Most people employ the strategy of fight or flight when involved in conflict. But fighting aggravates the situation while fleeing leaves the issues unresolved. There is a biblical way and that is, to move toward the party we are in conflict with. It means taking the initiative to iron out the differences with humility, with an admission of one’s part in the conflict.

SELF-CENTEREDNESS. Proud people are self-centered.  Self-centered people are usually miserable. Because they have this feeling of self-importance, they think they are important enough to be talked about all the time, and are therefore wary about what other people are saying behind their backs. They drop lines like: “I deserve to be happy.”  “This is my right.”  It’s all about I, me, mine. They think the world owes them and that it exists to serve them. Hence, when the world fails them, they are angry that they do not get to have a piece of joy.

From the time of birth, our selfish nature surfaces even without being taught. We seek attention, lay claim to everything we see as ours, throw tantrums when we don’t get the toy we want from the store, fight with playmates when a piece of candy is taken from us. When we’re older, we scramble to get the last vacant seat in the MRT train without giving way to the elderly. Bus drivers along EDSA load and unload in the middle of the road with no consideration for other motorists.

Jesus, though He is God, rich in majesty as King and Owner of everything, emptied Himself, became poor and took the form of man, in order to serve mankind in all humility. He sacrificed His life on the Cross for death to be conquered, and its sting removed. All these he did in obedience to the will of the Father. Clothing ourselves with humility is to have the same attitude and mindset as Christ’s. It means dying to self.  It is yielding our rights in favor of another. It is thinking less of self and more of others.

Christianity is not an abstract. It is living the example of Christ. When we have Christ in our hearts, joy is ours. We lose it only when we allow joy robbers in through conflict and self-centeredness. Through humility, they are barred from trespassing.